To Be Free
by ClumsilyAddicted
Summary: Makoto always hid behind his smile, never showing his true feelings. During the swimming competition, he's noticed a sudden change between Haru and Rin, and he finds himself not liking it. After dealing with unexplained feelings and an unexpected turn of events, Makoto starts to lose it. ―Makoto


**To Be Free**

_**warning**_

_**-yaoi(no smut)**_

_**-semi/related to episode 8**_

_**-makoto&haru/nagisa&rei, slight rin&haru**_

**Written by:**

**DeliciouslyAddicted & ClumsyMustache**

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Makoto glanced over intently, staring down directly at his friend Haru and Rin.

_Haru… _

A frown fell onto his lips at the negative thought, his hands tightening in intensity.

"Go Haru!" Rei finally piped up, a light blush on his face at the loudness of the cheering. Makoto smiled, letting out his own cheer as he continued to watch, the whole world seemingly slowing down.

_Haru…! _

"Yes! I won!" Rin shouted in obvious triumph, splashing his fist into the water, breaking the surface.

Makoto watched Haru's expression, feeling lost.

"Makoto!" Nagisa called from the pool deck. Makoto stood up and hid his unexplainable feelings with a smile that made his eyes twinkle.

"Makoto!" Nagisa called again. Makoto rolled his eyes and called back.

"Yes?" Rei and Nagisa ran up to him on the bleachers, making the stairs shake like crazy. Makoto wobbled, unbalanced, and fell backwards only to be caught by something. Nagisa had caught him by his collar of his team jacket and was pulling him up before he could land on his bum.

"Thanks, Nagisa." Makoto stood back up and brushed his swimsuit off.

When it was his turn to swim, he felt adrenaline course through his veins, a sudden determination filling him. He _would _win.

For Haru's sake.

He didn't notice anything or one else but the lane he was in as he peddled forward, determined to bring his team to victory. He pulled his arms through the liquidy current taking deep breaths, focusing on the time he was taking.

Pushing off of the opposite wall he lunged forward, confidence suddenly boosting him even further along.

"Go Makoto Go Makoto!"

"Go Makoto! Go Makoto!"

He heard his old coach cheer and then the others echo, their words filled with trust.

All except for one.

_Where is Haru? _He couldn't help but think it, distracting himself slightly until it became a big blob of worrying in his head. He felt his speed decrease tremendously, a swimmer in the second lane passing him by with ease.

His hand touched the soft surface of the pool side and he looked up towards the scoreboard, knowing he had lost his match. He sighed, lifting himself out of the pool, walking over towards his cheering teammates.

"Good job Mako-chan, second place!" Nagisa cried happily, the small boy jumping with excitement. Makoto barely noticed, his forest green eyes beginning to search for a certain water-loving someone. He noticed Nagisa was starting to look at him with wondering eyes, and Makoto flashed him a reassuring smile. Nagisa relaxed and wandered over to Rei, talking to him about his race that was coming up.

"Truly a beautiful form, Makoto! I wish to be just as perfect in backstroke!" Rei said with another reason to respect Makoto.

"If you can learn not to sink first." Gou said. Everyone laughed as Rei stood there with a straight face, a deep blush spread across his cheeks.

"Hey, has anyone seen Haru-chan yet?" Gou asked. Everyone looked at one another and shrugged.

"I pulled him out of the hallway and he should be right over the-"

"Haru!" Makoto shouted with glee. He walked up the steps to Haru-chan, and smiled up at him. Haru looked away, with a light blush covering his cheeks.

_Haru… _

Makoto and Haru watched as Nagisa walked down the bleachers and towards the pool deck. Makoto stole a sidelong glance at Haru, longing to see him smile again. Makoto and Haru didn't speak until after Nagisa had gotten 2nd place.

"You did well." Haru said softly. Makoto was startled by his voice, not able to catch what he said.

"W-what?" Makoto said. Haru abruptly turned his head away, a barely noticeable blush blazing on his cheeks.

"I said the water was swell!" He covered up quickly, for some unknown reason he felt embarrassed.

His eyes trailed over to the Samezuka Academy team, a sudden pang filling him at the smug grin on Rin's face.

Makoto, trailing his gaze found himself darkening, a bittersweet feeling filling himself as he noticed who exactly Haru was gazing at.

He felt his heart pound hurtfully and couldn't stand to watch another minute, gazing the other way.

He couldn't understand it himself but it hurt. Seeing Haru all wound up about Rin. Right when he had finally gotten over said boy. Right when Makoto had lowered his defenses, Rin came back and stole Haru away.

Again.

But he couldn't hate Rin, he'd _never _hate Rin. He knew they had no control over the situation, and as much as he hated to admit it, he knew he had no control over it either.

Nothing's fair in love and war.

Love…

He felt a blush work it's way up his neck, a sudden bashfulness making him squirm in discomfort.

"Makoto?"

He turned to see Rei staring at him, a secretive gleam in his dark blue eyes as he readjusted his glasses.

He smiled wistfully at best at his teammate, trying to offer some happiness that was not there.

They all knew it, too. Who wouldn't notice? You'd have to be blind not to see the affections Makoto felt towards Haru.

_Or you'd have to be Haru-chan himself. _

An amused smile lifted his spirits, the shimmer in his eyes reappearing.

"Good job Nagisa!" Rei was the first to call, running towards his friend. Nagisa's slouched shoulders raised slightly, the look in his eyes telling them he was not pleased.

"I...I lost…" He pouted, staring at the ground in disappointment. Rei, noticing the blonde was feeling down, patted his back reassuringly.

"Lost? You did beautifully!" Rei encouraged, lifting his best friend's spirits. Nagisa began to sparkle with happiness, his sore mood evaporating.

"You really think so Rei-chan?" He asked in awe, a light blush dashed across his cheeks as always.

Makoto watched them conversing, slightly envious of how easy it was to be them.

Haru wasn't one with words. Or feelings. Or….anything but water. He didn't honestly care most of the time, he was very quiet, and he never expressed himself out loud.

So _why _did Makoto look up to him so much?!

He didn't understand himself most of the time, and he doubted he ever would.

"What did you think Mako-chan? Did you watch me?" Nagisa asked in hope that his Swim Captain did.

"I thought you were amazing Nagisa. And of course I watched you!" Makoto tickled Nagisa's sides and Nagisa ran down the steps in amusement. Rei ran down the steps as well because he wanted a drink of water before he competed. Makoto assumed that drinking water before the race was part of Rei's plan.

"Hey, Haru-" Makoto turned but he didn't meet Haru's eyes like he wanted to. He saw that Haru had left in the excitement of Nagisa losing.

"Haru…" Makoto said as if Haru could hear him. Makoto sighed and managed to drag his feet to the bottom step where the team was sitting. Makoto placed his elbows on his knees and slouched down in grief.

"Mako-chan! Rei's about to swim!" Makoto snapped his head up and smiled at Nagisa, then looked down to the pool to see Rei on the block.

"Ready? Go!" Rei dove into the water with perfect form and continued with this perfection with his swimming.

The cheering and Rei's swimming took his mind off of Haru. Only for just this moment though.

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**That's chapter one! Hope you enjoyed! **

**Please review if you did, thank you ^.^ **


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